Research on happiness consistently shows that being connected to other people is the single most important predictor of our happiness.
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One of the world's longest-running studies (an ongoing Harvard University study that began more than 80 years ago!) has concluded that good, warm and close relationships with family, friends and community are the single best predictor of happiness and good health.
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Malone, Cohen, Liu, Saillant, & Waldinger (2013)
Strong Social Connections Keep Us Happy and Healthy!
CONNECTION
Photo Credit: Alev Takil
By prioritizing time with family and friends, young families build connections and communicate the importance of these relationships to their children.
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Prioritizing Connection
"I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, valued; when they can give and receive without judgement; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship."
— Dr. Brene Brown
We tend to underestimate the importance of connecting
A study of commuters in Chicago showed that those who chatted with others, even strangers, were happier than those who did not. This was true even though participants believed they would be happier commuting in solitude,
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Epley & Schroeder (2014)
A study showed college students were happiest when they had strong ties to family and friends, AND high levels of commitment to spending time with them.
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Diener & Seligman (2002)
The highest measurements of happiness come from those most committed to prioritizing connecting
Photo Credit: Dakota Corbin
Photo Credit: Brooke Cagle
A great deal of attention has been given to the importance of children having strong and positive connections with their family and caretakers. What has received less attention is the importance of positive connections to peers. The critical role of childhood friendship is backed by extensive research which suggests that even for toddlers, friendships provide much needed emotional support and security. This is particularly so when children are experiencing transitions such as a move to a new school or neighborhood. The presence of friends during these times has been shown to help children successfully transition to new environments and support their ability to learn.
Carter & Nutbrown, (2016); Peters (2010);
Sohet et al., (2018)
The importance of connection begins earlier than you might think
Photo Credit: Jelleke Vanooteghem
Tips for Parents
Tip 1
Establish daily routines to ensure you find ways to meaningfully connect with each other every day. Time built into morning, mealtime, or bedtime routines tends to work well because of the regularity of these times for families.
Tip 2
Prioritize time to connect with those who are most important in your life and the life of your family. This increases opportunities for connection as well as communicates the importance of connection to our children.​​
Tip 3
Create traditions that provide time to celebrate the big and not-so-big moments in family life. Traditions around holidays and birthdays are often cherished celebrations in families but there are an endless number of other ways you can create unique family traditions. Ideas gathered from other families include: a first annual summer picnic, back yard camp outs, or simple family walks or game nights.
Tip 4
Encourage your kids to form their own connections and friendships early in life. Providing opportunities for them to see friends and to nurture these relationships allows them to practice social skills that will impact their happiness for a lifetime. If your child is struggling with social interactions there are things you can do to help. Build in success by preparing them in advance of social situations and talking to them about ways to manage the interactions they struggle with. Parents can also provide supportive supervision of playdates at home, or around specific activities (such as games, sports, or a trip for ice cream). This can provide needed support for children who are still developing independent social skills. You can also seek support from pediatricians, teachers, or counselors who can provide ideas to help your child learn social skills.